Two Stories That Must Join As One Or Many Hearts Will Break!

July 26, 2008 – 9:22 pm

Story One: “For God so loved the world that He gave His only Begotten Son.”(John 3:16John 3:16
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.  

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)  Is there anything that you love so much that you would give up the life of one of your children?  God did! He had had Jesus since the beginning of time.  Yet His love was so great for His sinful creations that He let Jesus be taken and horribly killed.  Maybe it is too much for we earthly parents to comprehend.

Is raising a child or, even better, children an easy road to follow?  I’ve met a few parents that compassionately tell me that their son or daughter has never given them one moment of regret.  Likewise, I’ve met parents appearing to be on their last leg both physically and emotionally and blame it all on their kids.  Would they or have they walked out on them, most often not!  The ones that have given up a portion of their control over their kids have been referred to a “professional.”

It is critically important that we as parents that are raising children with “issues,” know that God, Himself, had difficulties with his children as well (Isaiah 1:2Isaiah 1:2
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

2 Hear, O heavens, and give ear, O earth: for the LORD hath spoken, I have nourished and brought up children, and they have rebelled against me.  

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) (Isaiah 3:5Isaiah 3:5
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

5 And the people shall be oppressed, every one by another, and every one by his neighbour: the child shall behave himself proudly against the ancient, and the base against the honourable.  

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).  Are we trying to raise our children as we were raised?  Truth be known, we probably were not happy with how we were raised either.  How many times have we said something to the effect of : “My old man beat me until I was black and blue, what have you got to complain about?”  Well, maybe our parents, as much as they loved us, didn’t do the best job of child rearing either.

If we and our parents had followed God’s parental practices as laid out in his Holy Word, our children would care for those in the family that came before them. (1 Timothy 5:41 Timothy 5:4
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

4 But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to shew piety at home, and to requite their parents: for that is good and acceptable before God. piety: or, kindness  

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)  Timothy goes on to show us the worse side of child raising without the guidance of our Lord. (2 Timothy 3:1-42 Timothy 3:1-4
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

3 1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. 2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, false...: or, one who foments strife 4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;  

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)  If we are blessed with grown children and animosity still exists, we may have to bear that burden.  Though never, ever stop praying for God’s positive intervention.  God wants our children to be saved.  As long as they have some level of belief in God, we can affect their salvation and as their parents that is our God-given job!  Please read Psalm 103:17-18Psalm 103:17-18
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

17 But the mercy of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting upon them that fear him, and his righteousness unto children's children; 18 To such as keep his covenant, and to those that remember his commandments to do them.  

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.  It speaks to the service of the parent to God’s Laws and Covenants giving the protection of Eternal Salvation to their children and their children’s children.  

So maybe once we’ve reached the point of pulling the hair out of our heads, pounding our fists against the wall and screaming to God, “Why have you cursed me like this?,” we should get down on our knees to declare OUR faith and love for our God.  Maybe when we get our OWN SPIRITUAl BACKYARD straight, we can have a positive effect on our child or children!  Too often, I am guilty of blaming others of my own shortcomings.  Unfortunately, this is an all too frequent occurrence with parents – “Why blame me, when I can blame my kids?”

Okay, now the other story – that of OUR CHILDREN!  

Do our children love or tolerate us?  It is hard to tell some time.  There are those fortunate parents that hold a relationship with their child or children that “surpasses all understanding.”  It is a total mystery to the bulk of the rest of us struggling and suffering parents of children that neither respect us, listen to us and, quite possibly, never use the word “love” and our names in the same sentence!

To those parents that have a near perfect relationship with your children, I praise your adherence to God’s Plan of child rearing!  You may or may not want to read the rest of this blog.

For the rest of us who took on the task of child rearing with a “hope and a conceited concept that we grew up and look how we turned out” I now address us specifically.

I do not want to assume anything here, so I will just say, “Most of us did not use Dr. Spock, much less God’s Holy Word to guide our child rearing abilities.  Good or bad, right or wrong, we did it OUR WAY!  Does this mean that love does not exist between us as parents and them as our children – probably not – but respect and love probably runs a little rough now and then.  It is probably a reasonable excuse that our parents did not use God’s Word in our rearing.  But it really ISN’T a bona-fide excuse in the light of the obvious results.  Repetition of a mistake is still a mistake!

In Ephesians 6:1-4Ephesians 6:1-4
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

6 1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. 2 Honour thy father and mother; 3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. 4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.  

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we see the result of not using God’s Word in the upbringing of our children as compared to using God’s Word in this process.  A parent that “exasperates” their children are truly not using the parenting knowledge of God’s Holy Word.  However, the child that “obeys” his or her parents bring honor to them.  Which is your choice?  My children are grown and have children of their own.  I am still parenting and grand-parenting, but now I am doing my very best to suggest from His Word and not my selfish brain.  Do I get it right every time?  No.  But I am doing a lot better the second time around than I did the first.

Will Proverbs 17:6Proverbs 17:6
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

6 Children's children are the crown of old men; and the glory of children are their fathers.  

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be the rule in our family?  I cannot honestly tell you.  It is possible that Mark 13:12Mark 13:12
English: King James Version (1611) - KJV

12 Now the brother shall betray the brother to death, and the father the son; and children shall rise up against their parents, and shall cause them to be put to death.  

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will be more the results of our method of child rearing – maybe not quite this bad, but only you, I and God will know.

MAYBE IT WILL TAKE A COMING TOGETHER AS ONE!  Will it be easy, probably not.  Will it be worth the effort: WITHOUT A DOUBT!  

This is not a situation of them finally, after all these years, coming around to our way of thinking.  It is not a matter of us throwing in the towel of submission and letting them dictate the rules of the game from here on out.

It is going to God’s Word, getting a concordance (I have most all of the major concordances, but I prefer, day to day, the NIV Compact Concordance written by John R, Kohlenberger III (published by Zondervan).  Look under children, parents, family, love and our Parent God.  You may find other things of value in your search.  Give your child or children the Concordance and, if they do not have one, a Bible.  Explain, you are trying to go back and learn to do it right and would appreciate them doing the same from their perspective.  There needs to be an honest desire to make things better between us and them.  Do not give up if they reject the idea the first or second time around.  If their love is truly worth it to you and your spouse, please don’t give up!  E-mail me at edd@BlessedBooks.com and I will put you and your family on my prayer list.  You are not in this by yourself – you’ve got Jesus, The Holy Spirit and God Almighty and, oh yeah, a guy who can relate to you will be praying right in there for you and himself, as well.

Let our Christian Love and Joy join us as one beneath the Loving Gaze of our Almighty God!  May you and yours stay well and happy in the happiness that never ends – that of our Savior!

In Christ’s Love,

edd 

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